I'm fortunately past the point where I'm afraid of a little mark here or there, but I keep both of mine very clean. I'm careful (they never sit on a stand, they're always in the case when not in use), but it doesn't keep me up nights.
I do always polish/buff the frets when I change strings (about twice a year anymore, when I also lemon oil the fingerboard), I do like shiny frets. Otherwise, every once in a while, I wax 'em (Meguiars Gold Class) or use the Quik Detailer (both of mine have the hard, gloss finish). No more than I play anymore, the brass bits stay clean.
I'm afraid I don't get the 'distressed' finishes either. I don't like them for me, as they remind me of when things that looked like that were all I could afford to play !
J o e y