7 6 4 0 7 :
Proving that all politics are, indeed, local:
By special act of the Tennessee Legislature, you now CAN buy JD products 'to go': Still, as you correctly pointed out, a dry county, but I now understand all the new rest areas and DUI roadblocks right across the county line. . . but at least you can go home with more than TShirts and commemoratives.
DrIng Lindemanns: As it turns out, Tennessee has an elephant haven for former performing and otherwise unwanted elephants in Hohenwald. As they work for peanuts, there's only a small upcharge for the subsonic 'Call of the Wild' treatment, plus mileage. I would definitely suggest checking your replacement insurance value as some of them are still mighty angry from the Three Rings, if you know what I mean. Clowns, little kids, for God's sake don't show them a banana . . .
OK. I'LL MAKE THIS TODAY's SPECIAL:
Since Hohenwald is not THAT far from Lynchburg, I'll bundle the 'Call of the Wild Subsonic' treatment WITH the 'Charred Oak Jack Daniels'
treatment FOR NO ADDITIONAL CHARGE. I think this is a hell of a deal, since I have to go their with an empty stomach. I went there with a bass right after lunch at a Thai barbecue buffet, and . . . once the ol' tuskers cut loose with those 10 hertz oinks . . . well let's just say it wasn't pretty.
BUT THIS IS A LIMITED TIME OFFER. ACT NOW BEFORE THE SUNSPOTS BEGIN !
J o e y
(let ME optimize all those wood fibers for you!)