Hmm...I might get an OK-grade instrument cable and swap the fuse out, and then film this whole process. On the driveway. At night.
If the trick to playing chicken is knowing when to flinch, then I might get broasted. But this is starting to sound like it could be fun after all, AND be an excuse to buy some cheap work coveralls or a tactical lab bathrobe for safety. Thanks for the continued input and ideas, y'all.