Guitars can be dangerous

[lbpesq]

There is a news report about a woman who was convicted of killing her guitar collector husband by hitting him with a guitar.  At her sentencing, the judge inquired first offender?  To which the defendant replied no, first a Gibson, then a Fender.
 
Rim shot
 
Bill, tgo

[bigredbass]

See?  I knew it was a cheesy advertising slogan, Only a Gibson is Good Enough . . . .  
 
Joey

[jazzyvee]

That story would have been 'Epic' if she'd used an alembic :-O

[edwardofhuncote]

I seriously did repair a Gibson Granada (top of the line, gold-plated deluxe model) banjo once, that was a victim of domestic violence... it's headstock was snapped off, the neck broken at the heel, and the flange busted. I still can't think about the resonator without wincing. Story we got was it had been heaved down a flight of stairs. Somebody went to Emergency, somebody else went to Jail. (but there were no fatalities) =)
 
(Message edited by edwardofhuncote on November 06, 2015)

[terryc]

Women always complain about how many guitar/basses we own !
You can't play them all at once
Reply from man  
You can't wear all those shoes, or those dresses and outfits and you can't take all those handbags out with you either
Checkmate !!!!

[terryc]

Women always complain about how many guitar/basses we own !
You can't play them all at once
Reply from man  
You can't wear all those shoes, or those dresses and outfits and you can't take all those handbags out with you either
Checkmate !!!!

[sonicus]

[ed_zeppelin]

In case your neck hairs didn't stand on end at the mental image of a Gibson Granada banjo cartwheeling down a stairwell, to put it in perspective: Earl Scruggs played this one for his whole career:
 
http://www.earnestbanjo.com/gibson_banjo_RB-granada_mastertone_9584-3.html
 
... In the world of prewar Gibson banjos, there is no model more legendary than the original five-string Granada with one-piece flange and flathead tone ring.  Fewer than twenty of these banjos were produced, making them many times rarer than Martin's famed prewar D-45 guitars. ...
 
Foggy Mountain Breakdown, the Beverly Hillbillies Theme and Will The Circle Be Unbroken were all recorded with that banjo. It formerly belonged to Don Reno, which in the bluegrass world would be the equivalent of a Strat that Clapton recorded every song on, that used to belong to Jimi Hendrix.
 
Oh, what the hell. I'm just throwing this weird 1915 Knutsen harp-mandolin out there because it was something I ran across while trying to find Earl's Granada, and some instinct tells me this is a pre-derailed thread anyway (my favorite kind  )
 
 
 
The story: http://www.vintageinstruments.com/mandolins.html
 
It's the baby brother of Michael Hedge's 1915 Knutsen harp-guitar:
 
 
 
Hum-canceling headgear optional.

[edwardofhuncote]

Just to clarify - the one I fixed was a 1990's reissue and not an original pre-war Granada. It was however an extremely fine example of Gibson's best recent work.  
 
One little brag here, related to a short exchange we had the other day about luthiers and repair guys... this banjo changed hands a few years ago. The young man whose bride had flung his banjo down the stairs fell on hard times (what with lawyers' retaining fees and all) and sold it. Years past, and it resurfaced in another town, and someone else I know bought it by chance. My old repair and touch-up was so invisible that he was totally unaware of the grave misfortune of his banjo's past. And I gotta say he was also a little pistoff when I told him about it.
 
I'm probably a little too proud of that.

[ed_zeppelin]

How many bassists does it take to change a lightbulb?
 
One!  
 
Five!
 
One!
 
Five!
 
One!
 
Five ...

[gtrguy]

How many lead singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
 
Only one, but to screw it in they have to stand still while the rest of the world revolves around them

[edwardofhuncote]

For the record, it takes 6 banjo players... only one to screw the new bulb in, but 5 more to gripe about how that's not how Earl did it.
 
:ducking for cover:

[cozmik_cowboy]

How mwny bluegrassers does it take to change a light bulb?
 
5 - 1 to change the bulb & 4 to complain it's not real because it's electric.
 
 
How many hippies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
 
Hippies don't screw in lightbulbs; they screw in Volkswagons.
 
Peter

[lbpesq]

How many luthiers to change a lightbulb?
Just one, but it takes six months.
 
And the all-time best:
 
How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None.  Don't worry, I'll sit in the dark.
 
Bill,  (who was circumcised and Bar Mitvahed) tgo

[gtrguy]

Grumpy cat knows all