Alembic Guitars Club

Connecting => Miscellaneous => Topic started by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:06:05 PM

Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:06:05 PM
In a shameless attempt to get to 200 posts, I will now ask and answer some very important questions. It's a relaxing Sunday, so please ignore me.
Mike
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:07:58 PM
Why is my tailpiece .0004 off center?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:08:49 PM
Who cares! Just play your bass!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:10:41 PM
Why is my bass not ready yet?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:11:40 PM
You haven't ordered one!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:13:20 PM
My volume pot is scratchy.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:14:10 PM
Twiddle it back and forth 100 times!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:16:55 PM
Someone told me that Squier basses are better than Alembics!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:18:10 PM
Stop reading the Talkbass Forums!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:19:22 PM
I read that Bruce Becvar ghost builds all Alembic basses!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:20:22 PM
Stop reading Ed Roman rants!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:22:07 PM
My tone filter makes a Wah sound with the Q switch on!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:23:24 PM
QUIT twiddling it back and forth!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:25:15 PM
Why does Alembic sell Flitz metal polish for more than Flitz does?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:26:35 PM
Because they are trying to make a living, stupid!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:28:20 PM
Why can't I sell the Alembic I overpaid on E-Bay for more than I paid for it?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:29:08 PM
No answer needed, stupid!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:32:04 PM
Does Alembic make an Olympic model?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:33:31 PM
They are the same thing.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:34:57 PM
Can I buy a gross of Alembic logos?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:35:39 PM
No
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:37:06 PM
OK-how about just a dozen Elan stickers?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:37:50 PM
NO!!!!!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:38:52 PM
Is that a rabbit over there?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:39:47 PM
Yes.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:42:54 PM
Is Al Gore the anti-christ?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:44:09 PM
Possibly.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:45:13 PM
Where is Texas?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:46:08 PM
Northern Mexico.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:47:06 PM
Where is California?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:48:11 PM
Northwest Mexico.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:49:33 PM
I saw a 1962 Alembic on E-Bay. What is it worth?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:50:29 PM
Nothing.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:52:01 PM
Tired. Can't go on.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:53:38 PM
Suck it up! Rub some dirt on it! Quit whining you baby!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:54:55 PM
Am I there yet?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 04:56:35 PM
200 Posts! Funny, I don't feel any different.
Mike
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: David Houck on July 01, 2007, 06:16:51 PM
Congratulations!  You are now a dues paying member!  You have the option of paying monthly; or pay the entire year up front.  Please send remittance immediately upon reading this post.  Thanks; and enjoy all the benefits of being a dues paying member!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: dela217 on July 01, 2007, 06:23:28 PM
That was funny! You covered all the common posts.  But you could have mentioned something about lemon oil.
 
Michael
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: chuck on July 01, 2007, 06:34:36 PM
Is lemon oil a good foot rub?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: chuck on July 01, 2007, 06:36:48 PM
Yes. But your cat will hate you.
 
Chuck
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: chuck on July 01, 2007, 06:39:08 PM
Only 65 more to go.
 
Chuck
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 07:16:16 PM
UUHHHHHHHHHHHH= Dues?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: precarius on July 01, 2007, 08:00:03 PM
But you could have mentioned something about lemon oil.  
 
Do I have to use lemon oil or can I just use unicorn urine like on my other booteek basses?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: bracheen on July 02, 2007, 06:20:59 AM
That's a good start Mike.  Now you can shoot for Senior Member.  Maybe you could do your next 600 posts touting the virtues of your favorite strings.  
Sam
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: Bradley Young on July 02, 2007, 06:48:38 AM
Why does this thread remind me of grade school?
 
All we need is a chalkboard.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: georgie_boy on July 02, 2007, 07:02:45 AM
I just want a bottle of what he was drinking at the time he did this!
 
 
Congrats on getting to advanced member
 
G
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: terryc on July 02, 2007, 07:50:18 AM
I was hoping to get 200 in before my 50th birthday but alas no..what number am I at, upper 100th I think.
writing posts is like a hard bass solo, the first few bars look easy but as it progresses it get harder to fulfill.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: lbpesq on July 02, 2007, 08:51:22 AM
You also forget beer ... How about getting two birds with one stone:  After I oil my neck, can I put some of the lemon oil in my Tecate?
 
Bill, tgo
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: 57basstra on July 02, 2007, 09:24:10 AM
Al Gore?
 
Not hardly.  
 
Other potential candidates for that dark slot jump to mind.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: dtrice on September 04, 2007, 10:09:10 AM
Can anybody jump on the 200 post bandwagon?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: dtrice on September 04, 2007, 10:10:29 AM
I'd jump on if it ain't moving too fast.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: dtrice on September 04, 2007, 10:12:09 AM
New forum members will look at me and be like wow, 200 posts he must have a lot of knowledge to post.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: dtrice on September 04, 2007, 10:13:48 AM
But, they would be so very wrong.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: 811952 on September 04, 2007, 07:02:45 PM
Don't forget to ask about motorcycles, and what kind of oil is best for those...
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: bsee on September 04, 2007, 07:25:17 PM
lemon oil, of course!!!
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: bracheen on September 05, 2007, 06:10:55 AM
This still isn't an official thread until beer is mentioned, Root or otherwise.
 
(Message edited by bracheen on September 05, 2007)
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: speicky on September 05, 2007, 07:08:18 AM
Q: I love my Spoiler so much, and I would like to have a second Alembic, but I can only spend 100 bucks or so. Can anybody help ?
 
A: A gallon of (insert your favourite headache brand here) beer should do the trick, at least until tomorrow...
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: dtrice on September 05, 2007, 08:48:17 AM
Can I get air conditioning and Power Windows with my Alembic motorcycyle for $100? Where is the beer?
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: dtrice on September 05, 2007, 08:49:15 AM
Hey, half way there.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: bracheen on September 05, 2007, 08:53:36 AM
Oops, sorry Bill, you mentioned beer way back in July.
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: cozmik_cowboy on September 05, 2007, 02:26:49 PM
Less than 10 to go - should I go ahead and do it this way?
 
Peter
Title: Schizophrenia
Post by: cozmik_cowboy on September 05, 2007, 02:29:43 PM
Nah, I'll wait for it to happen organically - it's not like I'm not going to post anyway.
 
Peter